Moment is Everything

Today was a day filled with positive moments and one shocking blow. I began this day by watching a movie about the Mafia. I happen to be in Italy and for the time being it seems like Mafia moves are a stand out option. After this movie ended around 10am I went back to sleep and woke up around 3pm. At this point I walked across the bridge and began to write in my personal journal. Besides my blog which is public I have started a personal journal meant to get everything off of my chest. Basically a lot more complaining than I do here on this page. As for the shocking blow, you probably guessed it, ex-girlfriend issues. It is funny how the world works sometimes and lets just leave it at that.

The point of this blog is not to complain about girls hurting my feelings or stories of sleepy afternoons but rather it is about logging my personal growth and achievements over this period of time that I will be in Italy. I am growing as a person because my normal reality is constantly being ripped apart on a daily basis. Everything seems to be changing at such a rapid pace and I am the only one that seems to be aware of this. This must mean it is happening only to me at this moment in my life. While other people may be experience similar growing periods in life right now, this experience is truly unique to me. I am the one who feels the pain before the joy, I am the one that has to hit the bottom before I can start my journey to the top, and I am the only one who can learn how to make myself happy on a daily basis.

I wish no bad thoughts on anyone especially the ones who have hurt me. I know that they did not hurt me rather it was my mindset that allowed the pain into my reality. The only reality that does exist is that life is what I make it. If I choose to be happy, sad, morose, gloomy, etc., I will be it. This is much easier said than done, I promise you all that. In my journal I record my thoughts on my own existence, my ability to help the world achieve a perspective of the bigger picture, and I focus on the power that lays inside of my mind which is hardly utilized. I am looking to grow my mind and my spirit in this next decade and with that growth bring some knowledge and prosperity to the world. This blog may be the preachiest and off-topic entry yet but all of this needs to be said.

"I am Jason Brooks and I am on a journey to find happiness."

I often tell people that I do not want a career or a job ever but since I live in this reality I know I will have to earn money to survive. I will get by one way or the other but always because life allows me another day. My actions and thoughts all come from the same place in life; confusion. I am confused about life because I do not understand it. How I can exist in this time and be who I am while others have come before me and will leave after me? This may not make sense to many but to me the idea of being eternally happy is something I have been searching for my entire life, even before I knew I was. I hope that I can continue this search for a lifetime because the second someone believes they have found happiness it will change on them. People are only happy until they are not. I believe my only option now is to choose happiness for a lifetime.