When bubbles burst

Life has a chaotic flow that can not be understood. It is not meant to be. It is a journey which allows to effect it but can not plan it. Previous to my recent experiences I have lived in a bubble. This bubble consumed my fears and cradled them. I only thought of the bad things that in my opinion were Immanent to occur, yet most of those fears never happened. I have realized I have literally nothing to fear except my fear to not try. Stepping into the world like this has been intense for me. I have been able to do and see things I didn't even know excited. I have eaten lunch in castles, I have seen where Columbus came back to the queen, I have seen a Tuscan sunset turn from blue to pink to purple and then to darkness, I have seen! I am very proud of myself and mostly happy about the fact that I am ready to continue living and see where I go next. I have no idea and no direction yet because I can't. I have made decisions which have aloud me certain opportunities down the line but for now I just want to enjoy and see what turns out.

What this trip has taught me is that I have value. I matter, if only to me. And that is fine with me. I have found myself back drawn to daily prayer and being more thankful for all that I have. I don't wonder about the things I left behind and imagine they will give me little joy when I see them all again. Living and being outside, social and open is what will bring me joy. I have met cool people in the last few months and the list keeps expanding. Great conversations are the best part of new friendships. Seeing where these people come from, who they believe they are, and where they are going next. I have realized I don't ask people certain questions anymore. No longer is it a concern of mine where people work. If they feel compelled to tell me I always listen and remember but I don't believe a job defines a person. I think life and character defines the person. This all may sound deep and preachy but it's not meant to be. This is what I think now because of my experiences in life and them leading me here. Tomorrow I don't know where I will go or what I will do. Today I will let happen and see where life puts me. I will pursues one thing on a daily basis, improvement of myself and my happiness.

I am still not sure why life has been so great lately but I'm sure it has something to do with destiny. I have to thank my friend Subhash who I only met once on a sunny day in Sienna, Italy. We randomly met as we both looked lost getting on the train and found each other. We spoke of destiny, karma, love, family, and travels. A conversation that has impacted my European travels tremendously. Now wherever I go from this point forward I will always consider, has destiny brought me here? Do I need to alter this moment for my happiness to improve? Or is this Karma taking care of some unfinished business?

The beauty is I will never know. And I love that.